Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Fast Food
Thursday, July 15, 2010
porn-time interuptions
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Fap-Crap-n-Nap
The Perversion of Erotica
My childhood, in the rural county.
The family computer.
The 56k modem.
Growing up, the options for erotica were limited, but the possibilities were endless. Sure, there was lingerie catalogues, suggestive music videos, cheap, late-night, soft-core porn and infomercials, but these were merely ingredients in the big dish. Every titillating sense, no matter how small, or impossible, was imported into the spank bank.
From it, there was no limit. Nobody saying ‘No’ or ‘Don’t Do That’ or ‘You’re Done Already?’. Just synapses rerouting wildly between gargantuan-titted chicks, spliced together of dead pornstars and Disney princesses. It was sometimes hard work trying to keep an image in your mind, but it was always worth it. It was always new, and it was always exciting.
I tried opening up the spank bank recently, and to my dismay, it was nearly bare. The maintenance of the spank bank is a time-honored tradition, and one that I feel I had personally forgotten. I am taking steps to reopen it, filling it with new ingredients, but of course, it’s not the fate of my own spank bank that I fear for, but the fate of future generations. The idea of a spank bank has become measurable in megabytes instead of memories, and there is something wrong with that. It’s too easy to forget the beginnings of male curiosity. It didn’t start at redtube or tube8. It didn’t begin with youporn or pornotube. Its beginnings were about more than a click of the mouse and a quick fap-crap-n-nap. There was a time when I fantasized about getting home from school so I could open up my bank, and see what I’d gotten that day. I’ve begun to see if I can bring these days back for myself, and although I’m a little rusty in practice, I feel it’s something important that I’m working towards.
Thank you, you've been a terrific audience.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Chat Roulette
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Work Dumps
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Gettin' Fresh
You and I have had an off and on relationship via this for quite some time now, and I suppose I can begin being a bit more honest with you. I was watching television, and the characters were talking about this phenomena commonly referred to as regular sex. Anyways, I thought back to my past relationships, and the aforementioned regular sex, and I realized that what I miss most from sexual relationships is not the regular sex or the sex at all, but the intimacy of kissing. I love kissing. I mean sex is pretty great, but it’s not all that exclusive. I have two hands that I can fuck, so I really don’t need a vagina. What I don’t have is another pair of lips to kiss or make out with, which is why, in any relationship, I’ll always prefer making out to sex. I don’t mean to sound gay or anything, that’s just how I feel.
Thank you, you've been a terrific audience.